>> Ma1n 1ndex The Beginning [4/1/2026]
Without my crutch, I feel stuck / My brain is all mush and my thoughts are all muck / My good habits work but my bad ones are easier / I don't wanna use 'em cause then I'll feel sleazier / My crutch makes me feel nothing for life / Makes me mentally reach for the knife / Shit that made me happy doesn't work anymore / So I just sit here thinkin, starin, down at the floor / You can't tell anybody what is wrong / You can't even tell 'em here in this song / You're a fuckin dumbass, you did this to yourself / So go read how to fix it, it's right there on the shelf / There's a monster inside of you that can't control / And he won't be satisfied until he's full / We put him inside you cause we want more cash / So keep feeding him to add to our stash / I'm not a fucking addict / I just, have a bad habit / I don't, need to be fixed / So shut your fuckin mouth and suck my dick / Your ideology makes me feel like shit / Stop shunning me cause I don't agree with it / I'm gonna keep using it however much / Don't make me feel bad for having a / Crutch / With my crutch they made me feel sick / Made me depressed, made my week go by quick / They told me my crutch, was a disease / But now that I think about it I never had to sneeze / My crutch doesn't make me feel sad anymore / Now that I live by my rules and not yours / That book filled me with so much guilt and shame / In retrospect that shit was kinda lame / Their shit fucked me up / My therapist is tellin me it emptied my cup / They brainwashed me good with that bluff / Now I've finally had enough / I've had enough! / I'm not a fucking addict / I just, have a bad habit / I don't, need to be fixed / So shut your fuckin mouth and suck my dick / Your ideology makes me feel like shit / Stop shunning me cause I don't agree with it / I'm gonna keep using it however much / Don't make me feel bad for having a / Crutch

>>> B1OG 1NDEX ⋆✴︎˚。⋆ Lyrics above: Crutch - Rat Sauce

Hello dweller! This is the 1-1-1 blog! I'm going to use this space for a lot of things, but mostly to just keep track of shows I go to, and projects I'm going to work on.

Below here is my internet manifesto. Feel free to read if you like, so you can understand my motivation for creating this digital journal.


I've been on social media, given a screen to look at, for as long as I can remember.

From my stand-point, I never saw the issue. For the longest time, I used it as an escape, to get away from the cruel, physically painful world. When on a digital scale, the only thing I really need to focus on is what to watch, which song to dream to, which game to play next. It was so easy. It was so dangerous.

My older self now pays the price. My attention is shot, my insecurities louder than they've ever been, as mouthful after mouthful of slop is shoved down my gullet. How the once world I ran away too became a hell I could never escape.

So, copium. I'm creating my own space. My own log, that I can look back on as I grow. To create my own pocket of a digital landscape I can at least be proud of.

censorshipkills whenyoudie